Nicole's Story
I was born and raised in Sweden by my grandparents and my single mother. Naturally, I have met lots of people who have never set foot outside the country. I am not one of them. I love to travel, and I am always planning my next trip as soon as I get back from the last one.
Many people assume I have a bunch of money and say they would travel too if they were rich like me. I laugh, because what they don’t realize is that I am a budget traveler. Instead of spending my time in expensive resorts or luxury suites, I stay in hostels, and I get around by using public transportation or hitchhiking. I come from a rather humble background, and nobody is going to just give me money so I can travel. If I want to do it (and I do), that means I have to work really hard in the summer months at home, and save everything I make so that I can venture around the globe the rest of the year.
In my part of the world, I get stares and questions from people when I tell them I travel most of the time. They ask me why I travel alone, why I travel so much, and why I don’t just find someone to settle down and have children with. But I have never wanted children. I always knew I would not have a family. To me, personal freedom and travel are too important. I had an abortion 13 years ago and I know that was the right decision for me. I can’t imagine what my life would be like if I had gone on to have that child.
A lot of solo women travelers I meet hold similar opinions. I tell them there’s no reason to stress over having boyfriends, husbands, or children if we don’t want them, because we are all individuals and not everyone innately desires these things. During a recent flight to Micronesia, I happened to chat with a wonderful woman from Bosnia, who now lives in America and works as a rocket scientist. She has traveled to 142 countries (in contrast to my 80). We had so many things in common! It was nice to spend a part of my journey with such an amazing person who is on the same page as I am when it comes to opinions and experiences of travel.
As a single woman on a shoestring budget, I have encountered all kinds of people and situations in my travels. I think that good and bad people exist everywhere — they cannot be pinpointed to a particular culture or geography. So, to stay safe, I use my gut and the knowledge I have gained from past experiences. In Egypt and elsewhere in the Middle East, for example, I have learned to avoid eye contact with men and not to answer if they talk to me. On a hitchhiking trip from Botswana to Namibia, some people I met thought I was a prostitute because of my tattoos and told me that otherwise, as a woman, I should not have them. Even in the most progressive countries, like Germany, I have had to learn how to tactfully handle awkward and unwanted conversations, like when men stop me and say that I am old and should be settled down by now. Some women have told me they wear a ring to stay safe on their solo adventures because it implies they are not available, but I haven't done it.
Good things happen on my travels, too. Once, going from Ethiopia to Seychelles, I had a 13-hour layover in Nairobi. To avoid paying to get into the lounge, I ended up sleeping in a small room where the cleaning supplies were kept. When I awoke, I found an entire cleaning crew looking at me, because they (mostly women) would go there between their shifts to sleep. They were so nice and we had a good conversation. They even gave me a piece of cardboard to sleep on, which I thought was very generous of them even though it might sound like nothing. On another occasion, I connected with a woman on a local bus in El Salvador over the feminist tattoo on my wrist. The rules in that country are quite strict and women dress in very feminine attire, but she had short hair, baggy jeans and a tank top. We exchanged a few words and I found her to be a tremendously positive person. My Spanish is limited so we weren’t able to exchange numbers, but I still think of her and wonder how her life is.
For women who want to travel solo, my advice is simply to not be scared of going out in the world alone. There are a lot of solo women travellers out there — more solo women than solo men, in my experience — and most will give you nothing but good vibes. Instead of listening to what society says you “should” do with your life, listen to your own heart and follow your own calling instead. If I had paid attention to all the warnings from people back home about the dangers awaiting women who travel alone, I never would have gone anywhere. Considering all the amazing people I would never have met, and wonderful experiences I never would have had, that would have been more than a shame — it would have been a tragedy!
For more about Nicole, follow her on Instagram.
Artist Notes
“Here, Nicole is on Aladdin’s carpet, travelling alone with her two bags. I chose Aladdin’s carpet because it says that she can go wherever she chooses and doesn’t have to listen to anyone. Parts of her gown are flowing gracefully in the air, which symbolises how happy and light she feels with all her travels. The carpet is shown flying above a canopy of trees, representing the heightened knowledge, wisdom and compassion one can amass with experiences of travel. ”
Published Mar 1, 2020
Updated Aug 23, 2023
Published in Issue V: Taboos